Distant Shores and the Islands Will See Your Light

A Love Story Penned by God - Part 4: The Courage of a Beautiful Warrior

2010-05-01T21:33:00.014+02:00

In this update, a beautiful warrior named Summerah selflessly and courageously risks piercing the heart of Montaña to bring God's hope and life deep into his heart.

Montaña had left the United States on a journey for adventure, on a journey of healing to be released from the slavery of selfish success, from the slavery of feeling like his longings and desires were perhaps for another life. He was on a journey that would eventually lead him to know that who he was created to be was good; very good. And that the world needed him to be who he was and no one else.

During the first five weeks of the Grand Adventure, Montaña began to question what it meant to create life, what it meant to share something with people that could change the lives of those around him in the midst of some of the most extreme poverty he had ever seen. He longed to know how he could change the world, longed to know what real life was, and longed to know that he could be a part such an amazing adventure. In between finding joy running in the hills of the Philippines, he would pour concrete day after day, trying to make friends, trying to fit in and perhaps be a part of the solution to the hurting all around. He knew Jesus was the answer, but how was He the answer haunted Montaña day after day.

Yet weeks later in Hong Kong, Montaña began to finally feel the weight of being crushed, the weight of being told many times during his life that he was worth nothing, that he had nothing to offer the world. All the hurts of the past came up once again in full force, and he felt like he was in a fight for his life and just wanted to run and hide. But he knew he couldn't; he knew that God had him on this grand adventure for a reason. There was true freedom through the impossible wall of darkness to be found somewhere, somehow, someday.

One day in the kitchen while he was being prayed for, Warrior Summerah stood up and fought for his heart. She bodly told him who he was, spoke life over him, and spoke hope directly into his heart. To this day, no one has ever been able to reach so deep, never had someone's words brought so much life in the midst of hopelessness. Even a month later a few days before leaving for Kenya, her courage, love, and friendship had left its mark. And something within him knew she needed to know how significant her courage had been to his heart.

Summerah had already been a relief for Montaña's heart, a light in the darkness. He could be real with her and began to love her friendship. Yet little did he or she know how essential of a life-bringer she would be in God's story of his redemption and healing in the months to come.

- Montaña

To be continued...

A Love Story Penned by God - Part 3: The Power of Prayer

2010-03-14T00:27:00.002+01:00

In this update, find out how Month 2 plays out for Summerah, Montaña, and their Creator in this latest update to “A Love Story Penned by God.”

After heaving her gear into the arms of one of her fellow warriors to be loaded for transport within Hong Kong, Summerah stepped gingerly onto the bus, her eyes roving the seats for a vacant seat. Moving down the row, she selected a seat in the back and settled into the seat, trying not to pay attention when Montaña stepped on and chose a seat in the front. As the two teams neared their first location, Summerah found her thoughts wandering toward the upcoming month and her typical concerns of meeting the contacts, interacting with her team, and engaging in ministry.

Upon arrival at the ministry base and unloading the gear, everyone settled into life in the two apartments allotted to the girls and guys…except for Summerah. She was anxious after all of the traveling to explore the area and go running. After asking all of her usual running partners, Montaña overheard her and asked, “Can I go running with you?” Summerah was a bit shocked, pondered whether it was wise to run with him alone, and then, in an attempt to avoid any awkward silences, quickly assented with a nod of the head and a bright, “Sure!” Heading out to run and explore Hong Kong, Summerah was immediately put at ease as she and Montaña fell into amiable conversation. Before she knew it, they were running to the beach, jumping fences of locked parks, finding dead-ends…this was not her typical running experience and she found that she truly enjoyed the spontaneity and adventure-seeking as opposed to logging distance and time.

As time passed at the base, Summerah wondered how Montaña was doing. He seemed distant and perhaps even hurting. She noticed that his adventurous nature could isolate him from his team and was often blamed for many misunderstandings among teammates. One particular night while Summerah was playing a card game with some teammates, Montaña walked into the room and slumped into a chair. When the girls in the room started asking him questions, he began to share some of the struggles he had been having with the Creator. After sharing, the three girls desired to pray for him and Summerah was overjoyed because NOW she could actually pray for him as they were in a group! While the other two prayed, Summerah was silently asking the Lover of her heart and Montaña’s heart how to pray for him. Her natural instinct was to pray for freedom and a correct view of the Creator; however the Creator had other ideas! He began flooding her mind with images of mountains, maps, airplanes, and adventures for Montaña. The Creator showed Summerah how He had placed the wild spirit within Montaña for many reasons – to develop leadership, to be bold and courageous, to follow the Creator no matter the cost… Summerah was stunned and a little jealous that she probably wouldn’t be able to experience those seasons of Montaña’s life with him. While she waited for the other girls to finish praying, she grew more nervous about telling him what she felt the Creator saying and what the others would think of her. Yet, when the other girls finished praying, Summerah spoke out boldly:

“Montaña, I see a topography map and God is leading you across it. He has made you to be a leader and a risk-taker, one that goes on before others will think about attempting the ascent. I know it’s difficult, but if you let your team bring you down from the risk-taker I know you to be, I will be really upset!”

At the end of the prayer time, Montaña said to Summerah, “I’m not really sure what the picture meant that you received, but thanks for the prayer.” As all prayer members dispersed to their rooms, Summerah shrugged her shoulders and thought, “Well, it was a pretty cool picture, O my Creator. I know that you will faithful to show him what it means.”

A week after that prayer, the two teams left for mainland China. At first, Summerah struggled with the feelings of oppression and lack of freedom. Changing her speech to protect her relationship with her Creator and feeling struggles with team, Summerah sought our friends and other leaders to be reminded of the hope she had in the Lover of her soul. It was during this time that she recognized the easy and genuine friendship she shared with Montaña as daily, when she saw him, she would ask, “How are you doing?” He would sigh and look at her; almost as if he didn’t really believe she actually wanted to know. Again, she would prompt him saying, “It’s okay, Montaña, you can tell me. I actually want to know how you’re really doing.” Finally, he would acquiesce and relay his feelings. It became a familiar pattern, where Summerah felt comfortable talking with Montaña and he could more easily share his feelings with her.

At the end of the month in China, there was a grand feast to give thanks for all the Creator had done in the lives of all His children. During the great banquet, the commander of all the groups of warriors gave the order, “Speak words of affirmation over each person at every table. There will be no idle chatter!” As the banqueting hall filled with voices of love and encouragement, Summerah found herself surrounded by friends, mixing easily into conversations as she began to clear plates when the meal was over. She was so involved in her discussions and duties that when Montaña approached her with something to say, she hastily retorted, “I’m just in the middle of something. Please just wait a minute and I’ll be right with you,” as she turned back to a previous conversation.

Not a minute passed when she felt a presence behind her and a tap on the shoulder, “I really need to tell you this now, Summerah. Can you please listen?” She turned to see Montaña facing her with a solemn look on his face. When he saw that she was attentive to his request, he launched into his message: “I wanted to speak this life over you ever since our first week in Hong Kong.” (As he spoke, Summerah felt as if all life around her had stopped or faded away, as his words washed over her heart.) “When you prayed for me at the house, you really encouraged me. I was in such a great struggle at that point in time and your words showed me that I am important to God. I want to thank you for speaking truth over me and the love of God into my heart. So, thanks.”

When he stopped speaking, Summerah managed to say, “I’m glad the words encouraged you. I had no idea.” Her mind was still fuzzy from his revelation and she was surprised by his boldness to tell her his thoughts with all of the other warriors milling around. It was a comment that would stand out for months to come.

Some days after the banquet, the team of warriors packed up their belongings once again to head onto the grand adventure of Africa! Summerah was completely ecstatic to be fulfilling a lifelong dream of reaching this particular continent with the Lover of her soul. Praising Him for His perfect plans, she could only imagine the adventures awaiting her as she sat on the plane, peering out the window, searching the darkness for the first glimpse of life below. Once again, she became aware of a presence and there was Montaña standing on the aisle, asking if he could sit and talk for a while. Summerah motioned him to sit down and exhaled in the rest and delight of being his friend.

Throughout the next two months in Africa, Summerah occasionally saw Montaña in the large warrior group gatherings, even receiving a “comrade-type” hug from this strong warrior or a playful attempted dunking on the Nile River. As time passed, all of her previous romantic feelings and struggles with emotions toward Montaña were slowly fading and she truly began to believe she didn’t really have feelings for him at all. She was delighted to find this freedom in her heart, thanking the Lover of her soul for protecting her heart. It was at the beginning of the fourth month when the news was announced: “Teams will be switched next month!”

What will the new teams bring?

You’ll find out in the next chapter!

The Power of Voice

2010-03-02T11:30:00.000+01:00

The importance of your story...

When meeting people, we often tell them a story from our past or details about our present such as where we live or what we do. What about the future? Do we ever share our hopes for the future with the people we meet? Sometimes we do and sometimes we don’t. Why?

Perhaps we shy away from talking about future hopes for numerous reasons; maybe doubt it won’t happen, fear that we will sound foolish or prideful, worry about what other people will think or say… Yet, each time we minimize the importance of the hopes and dreams living inside of us, we let a piece of us die. Yes, I am proposing that NOT sharing the hope that lives inside of us KILLS the future. Each time I minimize the dreams and desires God has put upon my heart, I effectively make it more impossible for the dreams to happen…mostly because I forget.

Jesus shows us the importance of story. When He was born, people spoke about His future: His Aunt Elizabeth, His mother Mary, Simeon a priest, and Anna a prophetess (see Luke 1 and 2). They spoke boldly about His future as the Redeemer of Israel. They spoke out what God put on their hearts for the future about this boy. What were they proclaiming? His mission; His mission to “preach good news to the poor, bind up the brokenhearted, proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to the proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and to provide for those who grieve – to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair” (Isaiah 61:1-3). His future was the hope of Israel (and the world).

This is where the promise of story comes in! After Jesus’ death and resurrection (which many of the disciples did not believe because women came to tell them Jesus had risen), two of His disciples were walking on a road and they ran into Jesus yet didn’t recognize Him. In fact, they responded to Jesus and said, “We had hoped that he was the one who was going to redeem Israel” (Luke 24:21, emphasis added). Hang on a minute! It has already been proclaimed that Jesus is the hope of Israel (and the world). Of all people, His disciples should know who He is…but they don’t. WHY? They forgot what had already been proclaimed! They let the enemy steal their hope in Jesus and therefore the future.

This is why I proclaim that there is power in your story, power in what God has told you and promised you, power in the dreams of your heart because He has given you those dreams! Please share your story with the world!

Make Your Choice!

2010-02-16T14:03:00.004+01:00

~ Excerpt from Summer’s Journal, 2/16/10

“Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God…” ~John 13:3

Jesus faced the cross knowing that God, His Father had all authority and He had good purpose and plan for Jesus even in the sacrifice. Jesus knew His identity in God – where He came from, Who He belonged to. Jesus knew where He was going. Therefore, He could walk in complete boldness, fearlessness, service, humility with PURPOSE. He was dangerous because He was a DEAD MAN WALKING (see previous blog titled “Dead Woman Walking”) – dangerous in RADICAL love – not hatred, fear, or mistrust. Instead, He was dangerous to the kingdom of darkness, to the gates of hell…

I long to be that dangerous and it will cost me my life – surrendering my rights, my comfort, or my actual life. Whether admitting it or not, life comes with a cost, a choice. Choosing Jesus or not costs me my eternal position, whether I choose heaven or hell. If I choose heaven, I open my life to Jesus and lay down the way I was living so I can have freedom in Him. If I choose hell, then I surrender my life to sin, which is a life of slavery. Because of my choice to live for Jesus, I know authority of all life comes from God. He holds all in His hands - nothing is outside of His control. I am His daughter, bearing His image, becoming more and more like Him everyday (as I choose to walk in His ways). I am His beloved. I know that when I leave this earth I will return to His hand and be found in His presence...May it be after living a life of recklessly abandoned love OUT LOUD so that others may be affected by Jesus. May I walk in complete joy as I find myself at home in Him.

-God entered here in my thoughts-

“Do you know what I am calling you to, Summer [insert your name here]? A life of RADICAL obedience, EXTRAVAGANT giving, SACRIFICIAL worship, ALL-CONSUMING love - a life with no holds barred, no limits, no shackles, no chains...complete FREEDOM in me to be the woman [man] I have created you to be with incredible PASSION, LOVE, LIFE, EXUBERANCE, JOY, ENERGY, COMPASSION...to truly live every moment, risking hugely to see fruit, kingdom reality, the blessing and times spoken of by the prophets. How they longed to see what you see, to be a part of what you are living in, to move ahead with the power that LIVES IN YOU! You are the physical manifestation of my presence walking around, breathing on people, loving on people - truly being ME on the earth. "For the joy set before Him (Jesus), He endured the cross, scorning its shame and sitting down at the right hand of God." You have NOTHING to fear for "He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world." CATCH A GLIMPSE of My glory - of the power and purpose and plan of what I have in mind for the world and how I want to use you in it! Living for the greater reality - Kingdom reality lived out in the physical world.”

Friends, lets live for the Kingdom, for the greater glory of an all-powerful and all-loving God who has our best in mind!

Waves of Desperation

2010-01-27T15:50:00.007+01:00

With my eyes searching the darkness, the first visible foretastes of the now-crashing swells appeared as dark, ominous monoliths rising out of the obscurity before me. Each passing glance caused trepidation to rise up in my throat, inspiring the desire to run from the threat of being washed away in the overpowering flood. Yet at the exact same moment, I felt an awestruck sense of peace in the midst of the storm and an equally crushing yearning to become part of the swirling might and energy that was sweeping through my soul. The feelings became so uncontrollable I had to remind myself I was fully clothed, it was night and chilly, and I was at least a 30 minute walk from home where I could get warm and dressed in dry clothes in order to stop myself from leaping into the turbulent wake!The thundering was the first thing I heard, its roar deafening, threatening to consume everything in its path. Unaware of my surroundings, I assumed it was an approaching thunderstorm or a low-flying plane…yet when I turned a curious eye in the direction of the ensuing madness, I found its source in the crashing, churning waves of the Mediterranean Sea. Peering through the darkness, I glimpsed a hint of white, foaming swells in the distance and then immediately drew my eyes toward the dark strip of shoreline where wave upon wave rolled up and threw itself upon the sands as if trying to break the resistance of its boundaries. The shock of the impact acted as a magnet to my soul as my feet stumbled over themselves to turn my body in response to my heart, which had become enamored with a rushing desire to be as physically close to the power of the waves as possible. Hastening toward the nearest boardwalk providing me access to the surging deep, my excitement stirred up within my heart anticipating the moment when I would stand before the raging surf. In the next moment, approaching the spray and rolling breakers my breath left me, trembling overtook my body, and I stood rooted to the sand drinking in the sight before me in complete and overwhelming awe of the glorious force of water, wind, and tide expressing itself before the insignificance of me.

What would compel me to jump into the stormy sea at night fully clothed? Myself, I wasn’t sure, but there was something of God in that water. There was something about the power that scared me, yet intrigued me and wanted me to be a part of it. It’s like looking at a lion; it has the characteristics of a housecat that is cute and sweet, yet embodies wildness and an inability to be tamed. I realized that catching a glimpse of the untamed nature of God last night was what had encouraged my heart to dream to see Him accomplish the “impossible,” to believe that it is possible to know God and be fully known by Him, while at the same time standing back to look deep into the awesome ferocity, wonder and glory of God.

“Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me.” ~ Psalm 42:7

Somehow the deep places of me ached for the deep places of God in getting a taste of a holy and greater glory shown to me through the immensity of the pounding waves. Yet, there was something required in order to physically experience the waters; I had to jump. It seems that in order to experience the deep places of God, a response from me is required and it asks something of me. I have to begin to lay down what I would consider my rights, my fears, my struggles, my pride. While these thoughts send a squeamish feeling through my insides, the beauty and grandeur of God draw me deeper than my insecurities can inhibit me. It is similar to looking into Aslan’s eyes in “The Chronicles of Narnia,” where there is an undoing of self that happens when locking gazes with Him because of His great love and His incredible power. When I remind myself of who God is, I cannot help placing my life in His hands…even when I know there is a cost.

This week at the training school I am attending, I was confronted with my firm grip on (or my right to) my relationship with my boyfriend, Joel; my pride both in confessing in front of a group and then being proud that I could be bold enough to share (!); my fear of being vulnerable as I cried in front of the group (something I haven’t done in a long time, especially in front of virtual strangers); and even my inner desire to be a peacekeeper instead of a peacemaker with my roommates and my boyfriend. Yet, despite all of the pain that has come to the surface, I know that God is working and He is faithful to see me through all the healing, surrender, and restoration that will ultimately come. It requires jumping into the thundering breakers of His power even if there is fear of loss and then truly realizing the wonder of His love as He brings new life from that loss.

“Like a rushing river am I
Like a raging torrent inside
I find that I’m free falling again
I’m letting go of the mountain view,
Letting go, but what into

You make ALL things beautiful
Just in time”

~ Misty Edwards, “Like a Rushing River”

A Love Story Penned by God - Part 2: The Set-Up

2010-01-13T23:48:00.004+01:00

This blog continues from a previous blog titled, “A Love Story Penned by God – Part 1: Blessed Beginnings.” Please read that blog before reading this one (it will make more sense).

Summerah held her breath now that her deep secret was out. Her thoughts began to run wild, “Will they send me home? Will I be looked down on for showing such weakness? What will people think?” The leader, in response, nodded her head, noted Summerah’s concern in her file, and moved onto the next question. Summerah then exhaled…

At the end of training, Summerah returned home with a fresh outlook on her life. She had been appointed the leader of her team, which was solidly in the grip of the Creator; she was free of any distractions from male warriors; and she was looking forward to beginning the world tour in a few short weeks. In the meantime, she maintained her daily communication with her Lover and kept up her exercise routine to maintain her endurance for the challenges ahead. During that time, her Creator and Friend showed her how He delighted in spending time with her, had specifically gifted her with a desire to see into the hearts of others, and was using both her gifting and exercise time to talk to people about Him. Her favorite encounter during that time was when she met a girl who was involved in dark arts. Summerah was running and saw a younger maiden walking through a meadow. She was carrying some luggage and left it in the bushes as she crossed over a stream. Curious, Summerah followed her and found her sitting on a bridge overlooking the water. Summerah asked, “Can I join you?” The girl silently assented by inclining her head, so Summerah sat down next to her on the bridge. Summerah asked, “What are you doing out here all alone?”

The young girl responded, “I am taking a holiday from my schooling.”

“What holiday are you celebrating? None of the other students have the opportunity to leave school today, do they,” Summerah questioned. While Summerah waited for the girl to respond, she took note of the girl’s dark clothes, the star-shaped pendant around her neck, the dark make-up encircling her eyes and by relying on the Creator’s spirit within her, discerned the work of the Enemy of the Soul within this young girl’s life. The girl’s youthful eyes sparked with creativity, yet clouded over with confusion and distrust when Summerah asked questions.

“It’s a holiday not recognized by my school so I take a holiday by myself. I celebrate nature and make potions. I don’t worship the Enemy of the Soul like everybody thinks,” she added hastily. “I don’t understand why people judge me. They tell me I will be forever lost in the Chasm of No Return because of my beliefs,” the girl spat out in indignation with nostrils flaring.

“Can I tell you what I believe,” Summerah asked. The girl paused in her tirade and her innocent, seeking eyes peered into Summerah’s as she nodded her head, all anger ebbing away. “I believe that there is a Creator who is a Friend of Your Soul and loves you very much. He has made you to be a leader and has given you a tender heart to love. He has always cared for you and He knows everything about you. You were His idea!”

In response, the girl stared unintelligibly at Summerah and then said, “Really? No one has ever told me that before.” Then, just as quickly as realization came, the same veil of confusion covered her eyes and she mumbled, “I have to go.” She quickly arose, walking away from Summerah and picking up her luggage on the way out of the meadow.

After the girl left, Summerah discussed the event with her Creator, “That was certainly unexpected, yet I thank you for the opportunity to battle the Enemy of Our Souls for her soul, O Lover of my soul. Thank you for this young girl. Please move in her life and let those seeds of truth spoken, take root within her soul. Thank you for using me to communicate your love.”

After many such scenarios in the time between training and leaving to travel the world, it was time for Summerah to meet up with her fellow warriors and leave her home for the Philippines. When she boarded the flight for the 16 hour journey across the sea, she found that she had an entire row (of 2 seats) all to herself and opted to sit in the aisle seat for the benefit of more leg room for the lengthy flight, even though she generally preferred the window seat. As she settled into her seat, she heard, “Summerah, is that an open window seat?” Surprised that anyone would be addressing her, here in the back of the plane, she looked up to see, who else but, Montaña calling to her from across the aisles of seats!

“Um…yeah, it is,” Summerah answered. Inside, she thought, “Great, nothing like being confronted by my fears and concerns right at the beginning of this entire thing! Well, at least I can get over my feelings because I’m sure spending 16 hours with him will show me how boring or self-absorbed or not the ideal guy (or any other excuse to not be interested in him) he is.” Unknowing of any of Summerah’s thoughts, Montaña seemingly vaulted the seats with all of his warrior gear and planted himself in the seat next to her. “Here we go,” she mumbled as the plane taxied for take-off.

For the first hour, Montaña and Summerah maintained cordial conversation about hopes and expectations for the following eleven months around the world. They talked of family and Montaña talked about the mechanics of the plane, detailing the effect of clouds on flying and the actions of the pilot at any given moment of the flight. Summerah found that instead of the boredom or apathy she expected, she was well-entertained and could even share her deep, heart-felt, contagious laughter with Montaña. While they took breaks from talking in order to sleep, their slumber was short indeed and they seemed to enjoy their time more aptly by watching movies or the approaching sunrise. At the end of the flight, Summerah found that she was sad to leave the plane or more truthfully her newfound friend, Montaña, no matter the discomfort of her legs and swelling feet! At the same time, she was mindful to keep her thoughts focused on her Creator, bringing Montaña to Him and reminding herself that she was only friends with Montaña.

Upon arriving at the first location in the Philippines, Summerah faced adjustment and transition along with all of the other warriors in this new place. To aid with this transition, more training was provided before releasing the warriors into this new country to practice what they had learned. During this time, Summerah was glad to see Montaña, yet she maintained her distance from him to avoid the struggle with her emotions. Even in her avoidance, however, she noticed that somehow she would end up being around him. When she got up early in the morning, inevitably he would get up at the same time and recommend a book that she was already reading or during teaching times, she would find that they ended up sitting by each other or she would be gazing at the world map in the hall and he would comment over her shoulder about some amazing place he hoped to explore. At other times when the warriors were asked to encourage each other by speaking the Creator’s words over each other, Summerah felt comfortable speaking over the male warriors, all that is except for Montaña. In her frustration with her whirlwind of emotions, she cried out to her Lover, “You know that I long to follow you and only have a heart for you. Why do I find myself continually around him?”

She felt the Creator whisper, “I want you to be his friend.”

“Really? I can just be his friend? It’s okay?” Summerah was incredulous that this could really be true, but she trusted the Lover of her soul and believed He was working out His perfect plan in both her life and Montaña’s. Once the teams went out to their separate areas within the Philippines, Summerah felt more at peace with her emotions. She faced many storms to weather with her team, but she learned that she only had her Beloved to lean on. He whispered to her the lessons of the desert, “Who is this coming up from the desert leaning on her lover? (It was a lesson of learning the necessity of learning to lean on Him in her weakness.)” As the time for coming together with all of the other warriors approached, Summerah again found her thoughts drifting to Montaña, which she quickly confessed and dismissed as ridiculous.

Finally, the day arrived where all of the teams came back together, greeting and welcoming each other warmly. Summerah greeted all of her friends, yet missed Montaña, unintentionally or intentionally, she wasn’t sure. It was quickly remedied when she walked into the kitchen and came face to face with Montaña by the coffee supplied for the warriors. “Hello, Montaña,” Summerah managed to stammer, reminding herself that they truly were friends. “How was your month in the field?” In response, he sort of shook his head as if not sure or indicating that it was difficult; Summerah wasn’t sure. She pressed him, “Please, tell me how your month really went.”

Montaña then shared, “It was difficult. Honestly, I spent a lot of time working in the tunnel, helping the locals dig a ditch and I didn’t spend a lot of time with my team. It was pretty lonely. How was your month?”

“It was a challenging month. I struggled as a leader, but the Creator was faithful and showed me a lot about leaning on Him in my weakness…” Summerah replied.

“Really. How did he show you that,” Montaña asked, cocking his head, sipping on his coffee, and riveting his eyes on Summerah, showing genuine interest as if he had no other place to be than discussing her month.

Before answering, Summerah thought to herself, “He’s going to think I’m crazy if I tell Him about my experiences with the Creator as a Lover. Maybe I’ll just tell him what I learned this month and hopefully he’ll understand…” She then took a deep breath and said, “I’ve been lonely this month and I realized that all I had was the Creator. He spoke to me about walking through the desert and leaning on Him as a Lover. I will come out of the desert, but perhaps the reason I am in the desert is to learn to lean on Him, recognizing my inability to save myself or draw on my own strength. It was a tough lesson this month, but necessary.”

Montaña seemed to understand, despite the limited details Summerah provided. They discussed things from the month for a while and then parted ways. Later that day, the teams received their assignments for the next month. Lo and behold, Summerah and Montaña’s teams were paired together for their time in Hong Kong and China. Summerah threw up her hands to her Creator and said, “Whatever. Do what you need to do this month. I don’t understand your ways…”

Stay Tuned for the Continuation of the Saga in Part 3!

A Love Story Penned by God - Part 1: Blessed Beginnings

2010-01-05T18:49:00.011+01:00

Prepare yourself for a tale, told in a similar style to “Lord of the Rings” or “The Secret Garden.” Yet where these stories base themselves in the fictitious, the elements of the story you are about to read are completely true and happened to this modern-day adventurer! (If you would like to read actual accounts, check out my other blog at summersmith.theworldrace.org.) It is an epic story with battles and love, monsters and heroes, danger and peace, almosts and successes, risks and failures – all God-breathed and useful for teaching. I believe this story will bring glory to God, the author and creator of love, the designer of relationships, as it showcases how God works on behalf of those who wait for Him. Welcome to my world.

This story begins with a girl, a girl much like any other girl you would find in the United States of America. Her name is Summerah and she was living the “typical” life as a single woman, trying to make it on her own as a school teacher, paying rent on a one-bedroom cottage in a suburban city, buying into the independent mindset so often accompanying young adults in her culture while still opening her heart up to her Creator and asking him to heal her wounded heart. In the process of healing her heart from a broken romantic relationship, the Creator began to show her how He loved her as a Husband. Summerah could hardly believe the delight she found in understanding His all-surpassing love. She felt His delight for her, His acceptance of her, His passion for her. He came to her as she read His Word and asked her to dance. He whispered of His love for her. He sang songs to her as His “True Companion,” the one He couldn’t “take his eyes off of” as he “Danced with Cinderella.” He asked her, “Come Away with Me?” She could not refuse such a beautiful request, so she made plans to spend a night beneath the stars on a nearby sea, deep, alluring, and majestic.

At the same time, Summerah was pursuing her heart’s desire to travel around the world to tell people about her Creator and the amazing relationship she had with Him. She looked at it as another opportunity to spend a full year completely dedicated and in love with the Lover of her soul. She pondered how she would maintain her relationship with her Beloved, for you see two of His most amazing powers were invisibility and omniscience, whereby He could always be with her yet never be seen. Summerah loved the idea that she would never be lonely wherever her travels took her, yet she worried that men traveling with her could sway her heart away from her True Love. Desiring that He would always remain her heart’s True Beat, she committed her heart to Him for the entire traveling year and then wrote in her diary three ways she would know if a man was ever to be allowed within the alcoves of her deep and tender heart: he would pursue her heart after the year of commitment, he would pursue her, and he would love the Creator passionately (and maybe have similar experiences with Him).

Summerah left for her sea adventure with her convictions firmly in place in her mind and heart, set for a beautiful time in the natural world far away from the distractions of city life where she could breathe in the presence of her Lover. After a day of sun, surf, and hiking, Summerah returned to her humble lodgings – the hovel she found in the woods on the edge of the great sea. She built a fire in the clearing as she soaked in the beauty of the sunlit day, watching light dance across the waves of the sea. Suddenly, she felt drops of rain and grew slightly disheartened that the beauty of the day was ending. She retreated to the hovel as thunder and lightning sparked and crashed around her. “O Dear Creator,” she lamented, “how will I see the beauty of the stars tonight with this storm?” Immediately she heard His familiar whisper, “Do not worry about these circumstances.” Once the storm passed and the rains stopped, Summerah walked to the edge of the sea to watch the clouds roll out over the water. There in the northern sky she spotted a hopeful rainbow in the midst of the clouds and a shimmering sunset behind her through the breaks in the storm followed by an evening mist pushing itself onto the shore surrounding her in its damp and humid breath. After gazing at the darkening twilight sky, Summerah returned to her still-sputtering fire and stoked it back to full-strength. As she stared into the embers, she saw a beam of light fall over her and, curious, she turned around to see the moon beaming in a cloudless sky cutting a path across the sea, the beach, and entering into the clearing where she was sitting. His familiar whisper came then, “Come dance with me.” So, she roused herself from the fire, walked to the beach and waltzed in the spotlight of the moon with the stars standing guard as her watchful companions from above. That night as Summerah prepared for sleep, she found a cleft in a rock on the edge of the sea where she could sleep while delighting in the beauty of the night. As she laid snuggled into the rock beneath the stars, she imagined the arms of her Beloved wrapped tightly around her, holding her close. She woke in the morning to mist on the water as the sun peaked over the horizon, shrouded in clouds yet beaming out its radiance. Pondering the beauty around her, she realized that neither she nor a man in her life could ever have planned such a perfect getaway, where even the weather was accounted for. She looked forward to her next adventure of traveling the world with new eyes; ready to be completely committed to her Beloved, not turning her affections from Him, and using the time to delight in the Creator and all He had bestowed on the Earth.

About a month passed and it was time for Summerah to meet up with other adventurers like herself to prepare for the grand world trip. While spending time with other young men and women warriors, she was relieved to see the openness of all of them as they worked to develop a fellowship before leaving on the quest for the world on behalf of the Creator. They worked through strenuous group exercises, combat training, and survival classes in order to prepare for any such scenarios awaiting them on the world trek. It was during one of these classes that it happened. Summerah noticed one of the young warriors, Montaña, as he took leadership of his group and raced ahead in a matter of urgency to siphon water from a primitive water system to supply his team with necessary sustenance. Perhaps it was his courage and bravery or maybe his selflessness that first drew her attention, but it frightened her how quickly her heart was swayed. She immediately took the necessary precautions of barricading her heart and giving up this “transgression” of her emotions to her Creator, yet she couldn’t quite forget how she felt. For the next few days, she guarded her heart, pretended she had noticed nothing, and tried to forget what her heart had experienced. However, the moment of truth came when she had time to discuss her training with one of the group leaders. During this discussion, the leader asked, “Do you have any concerns in preparation for this worldwide adventure?”

Summerah responded with the truth, “I am concerned about the men who may be in my fellowship. I don’t want to be distracted by them and in the past, I have struggled with vying for the attention of men, especially warriors.”

“In that case,” the leader responded wisely, “are there any men in our group that you’re concerned about?”

Summerah answered resolutely, “Montaña.”

Part 2 Coming Soon!

Dead Woman Walking

2010-01-04T12:36:00.002+01:00

“Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” ~ Jesus, Matthew 10:19

In light of the recent terrorist attack on the plane going to Detroit, Michigan, I have begun to ponder the meaning of dedication and what it means to be sold out for Jesus. According to the dictionary, to be dedicated is to be “wholly committed to something, as to an ideal, political cause, or personal goal” and to be “set apart or reserved for a specific use or purpose.”

Why are terrorists so dangerous? They are completely dedicated to their cause. They believe, however misguided, that their sole purpose in this life is to die to advance the beliefs they hold and kill those around them to take out any belief that counters their own. In effect, these people are “dead men (or women) walking” at all times. At any moment, they are willing to lay down their lives, behaving recklessly because they are dead already, and have nothing else to live for.

Jesus asks His followers to have a similar mindset, but to approach those around us in the opposite spirit. Instead of hate and fear for what others believe, we are to stand in the face of opposition and meet it head-on with LOVE. It is a radical call and it requires a complete death to the idea of self-preservation. We are called to be Dead Men and Women Walking – people who are so passionate, so dedicated to Jesus that they are dead to fear and others’ opinions and expectations; yet brimming over with the life of Christ. What would it look like if I was a Dead Woman Walking? How would I behave? How would I interact with the world around me?

The other night in Spain, I went for a walk with my boyfriend, Joel, with the purpose of speaking to those around us and being the voice of Jesus to them. We saw a woman standing on the street and I greeted her, but I did not enter into a deeper conversation. We saw some teenagers laughing and teasing each other by the train, but I did not approach them. What held me back? Not a language barrier – I speak Spanish. Nope, it was my fear – fear of what they would think of me if I started speaking about Jesus, fear of rejection by them, maybe even fear of what Joel would think if I “failed.” I am so tired of feeling controlled by fear! Jesus declares, “He whom the Son sets free is free indeed” (John 8:32). I claim that freedom over my life, but then I have to admit death to myself and the things of this world that hold me back from truly living for the unseen.

In the movie “Dead Man Walking,” there is a scene just before the execution of Sean Penn’s character where he says in great boldness, “I’ll be done with all this. No more bars! No more cells! No more life in a cage! Miss Helen, I’m gonna die. God knows the truth about me. I’m goin’ to a better place. I’m not worried about nuthin’.” Even in the midst of his physical shackles and chains as he is being dragged to the execution room, he knows that this life does not have a hold on him as he looks to the unseen of God. He has freedom in who God knows him to be – as a son set apart from the physical world and its labels of his crimes.

We have all been given the freedom to walk as sons and daughters of the Living God, set apart with the great purpose of bringing life to others as we live out our physical lives for the glory of God!

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. So never be ashamed to tell others about our Lord. And don’t be ashamed of me, either, even though I’m in prison for him. With the strength God gives you, be ready to suffer with me for the sake of the Good News.” ~ Paul, 2 Timothy 1:7- 8

Climb Every Mountain

2009-12-10T17:36:00.000+01:00

Since coming back to the United States from the World Race just over two months ago, I have been experiencing mountaintops and valleys all with the visual reminders of actual mountains as I have moved to Denver, Colorado. Denver has provided a place for me to process some of the events of the past year. I know I still have more to do, but I am thankful for the lessons the Lord has begun to reveal and unveil.

Most recently, I accompanied my best friend, Joel Chitwood, and one of his friends, Chris, on a winter mountain climbing adventure in the Sangre de Cristo range of southern Colorado. I have been hiking with Joel before, so I knew that some of the things to expect were lots of snow, lots of challenge and lots of beautiful scenery. However, experience on the World Race should have prepared for me for one more thing...God will use any opportunity to grow and stretch His beloved ones, including me!

The plan was to climb a 14,000 foot peak called Crestone Needle in one day and camp back at the trailhead for the night. The entire roundtrip was planned to be 6.25 miles with an elevation gain of approximately 3,000 feet and an estimated time of reaching the top of the Needle around 6pm (six hours after leaving the beginning of the trailhead). Our first indication that things would need to change occurred when we could not drive up to the trailhead because snow filled the road ahead of us, rendering even four wheel drive useless. Thus, we were required to hike an additional two miles to reach the planned trailhead, adding four miles and 2500 feet in elevation to our proposed trek. As we hiked the snowy road, eventually donning the snowshoes I reluctantly packed, frustration grew within my heart. The beauty of clear blue skies, sunshine reflecting off of snow-covered peaks, and crisp mountain air should have been enough to keep my heart singing. Instead, my attention was drawn to the slippery trail where every step forward seemed to slip back two steps, my inability to keep up with the two guys I was hiking with which diminished my struggling pride, and the continuing upward climb at this early stage which placed a large demand on my already burning lungs and muscles.

Chris and I at the beginning of the trail hike, still smiling!

Finally, we reached the original trailhead where we got the first glimpse of the Needle and as I looked up at the rocky mountain peak, with snow swirling of the top, shuddering in the cold wind and faced with the reality of the challenge, I felt my heart sink further. Almost everything within me screamed to turn around, to quit this insane journey: my mind, my muscles, even most of my heart. Yet there remained a still quiet voice that urged continuing on toward the challenge. I pushed all of my doubts to the back of my mind and determined to put one foot in front of the other as I gritted my teeth against pain and cold and negativity. Gritting my teeth should have been my first clue that I wasn't approaching this hike with the right attitude...

The first view of the Needle...

Soon, we reached even deeper snow, where I fell in numerous times up to my hips. As I tried to pull myself out of the snow, I would only sink further as I could not find any solid footing beneath me. At this point, my fear of failure, my pride, my frustration in the midst of the physical struggle were all surrounding me, rising higher and higher, leering at me, pointing accusing fingers into my wounded, fearful heart. Questions within my own heart soon began to rise to the surface of my mind: "Is this even who I am?Do I even like climbing mountains? How do I ever think I'll be able to handle more challenges from the Lord or even be a part of His Kingdom if I cannot withstand the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual tests of this climb?" The struggle within became so intense that soon my battle became outwardly apparent to my climbing companions as I began to cry, swear, yell, punch the snow and refuse to continue.

As I sat on the side of the mountain, wallowing in what appeared to be my discomfort and inability to complete this challenge, Joel approached me and told me, "I don't care about summiting this mountain. The only joy I have in it is to complete it with you and Chris."

I responded, "I don't care. Just leave me here. You can find me when you come back down after summiting. I'm done."

"Summer, I know that deep within there is part of you that wants to complete this. If you quit now, I know you'll wish you hadn't. I'm not going to go up if you don't. I'm going to stay right here."

"YOU DON'T KNOW ME. YOU'RE A JERK AND I'M NOT CLIMBING ANYMORE OF THIS MOUNTAIN! I'M DONE. I'M SO DONE!!"

After sitting quietly seething for a while on the mountain staring at the top of the mountain, which was now also starting to leer at me, I looked at Joel and said, "The only reason I'm going to keep climbing this mountain is because I know that if I don't you won't. That's it. It's not because I love this or because I have strength or because I want to see the top. It's only because of YOU." (That last part was said with a lot of anger, spit, malice, and rage.) With that, I dug my frozen hands into the snow and crawled, crying and sobbing with snot dripping out of my nose, foot by frozen foot along the treacherous snow chutes until I could pull myself into the saddle of the mountain. By this time, the sun was setting, filling the clouds with a beautiful yellow light and drawing the brown hues of the mountains to brilliance with the contrast of the shimmering snows dusting the rocky ridges. (I was still completely distraught and refusing to take one step to look at the sight as I huddled into the shadow of the mountain to shovel in the sustenance of the hiker's trail mix I was jealously guarding in my gloved hands.) While the guys ate food, joked, and marveled at the beauty surrounding them, I glared at them and reminded them yet again, "I'm not going any further unless we are headed down the mountain and toward the car." Finally, it was deemed time to hike back down the mountain and I felt I was returning a different person. I have to admit, I felt a bit ashamed of my behavior, yet at the same time I felt triumphant.

This is the face of someone who is READY TO BE DONE!

I had looked at what felt like death straight in the face, swearing, crying, and behaving like a screaming, tantrum-throwing toddler, yet God was working. Throughout the entire experience, the Enemy shouted, "You're incapable! Joel is ashamed of you! You're not worthy! You can't do this! How do you think you'll make it if you go to North Africa in the desert and the mountains if you can't make it here? You might as well GIVE UP." Oh, but the Lord is so faithful! He would whisper, "This is training for North Africa. It won't be easy there, but you will make it if you keep your eyes focused on me. Keep going, Daughter. My strength is made perfect in weakness." I had to incline my ear to really hear Him over the other screaming, yet His quiet voice had given me strength to train my eyes on the heights of the mountain, gaze to heaven, and propel myself toward the peak.

"God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." 1 Corinthians 10:13

Breaking Forth the Dawn

2009-12-10T15:48:00.000+01:00

"Even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you." Psalm 139:12

What is it about the dark of night that seems so scary? Why do children wake up terrified in the middle of the night? Why am I afraid to run by myself at night, but completely confident to run while the sun shines? Darkness seems to be the threat - it threatens my security and my ability to see what is coming.

In an attempt to explain to a friend where the Lord is taking me, I shared a vision. In this vision, I started out surrounded by friends and family that was surrounded by darkness, but the Lord's presence was a beacon of light around all of us, allowing us to see the next steps to take. In my life, some of my most important relationships have started changing...yet it feels like they are being stripped away from me, leaving me completely alone in the darkness - a deep darkness where I cannot even see my hand in front of my face. In fact, it feels like I am being counted on to take the next step and I don't know if I will be stepping off a curb or a high dive. While I feel completely alone in this, I know this not true. The Lord is with me and knows exactly where my foot will fall next and even it was off a high dive, He would see me through it! (Besides, it's just water underneath anyway, right?)

"Let him who walks in the dark, who has no light, trust in the name of the Lord and rely on his God." Isaiah 50:10b

This morning I woke up in the EARLY morning darkness and in the midst of trying to fall back asleep (failing miserably, I might add), I started to worry. Actually, my mind began to race. First, I thought about Youth with a Mission (YWAM) and the money I still need to go out to Spain and Northern Africa. Then, I thought about my car and how I will deal with it if I don't come back to the United States for a long time. Then, I thought of my health issues that need to be taken care of and I don't have the time or the money or the insurance. Then, I thought of my best friend, Joel, and all that he is wrestling with. I thought of my missionary friend, Bonnie, and how I need to be praying for God's direction in her life. I thought of people I need to connect with. I thought of my parents and how much they are hurting with my leaving and not knowing what the future holds. I started to worry about what people think of the life the Lord is asking me to lead! I started to hear, "IRRESPONSIBLE - that's what they (who's "they"?) will call you...People aren't really going to support you for missions work. What are you thinking?"

Hmm...that doesn't sound like God...sounds more like the Accuser of all of our souls. So, in order to not give into despair and "woe is me" thinking, I opened my Bible and found some GREAT stuff in Isaiah. Read this!

"Before I was born the Lord called me; from my birth He has made mention of my name...in the shadow of His hand He has hid me...

He said to me, 'You are my servant, in whom I will display my splendor. It is too small a thing for you to be my servant...I will also make you a light...that you may bring my salvation to the ends of the earth.

I will not forget you! See I have engraved you on the palms of my hands...those who hope in me will not be disappointed. I will contend with those who contend with you. Do I lack the strength to rescue you?'

Because the Sovereign Lord helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore have I set my face like flint, and I know I will not be put to shame. He who vindicates me is near. Who then will bring charges against me? Let us face each other! Who is my accuser? Let him confront me! It is the Sovereign Lord who helps me. Who is he that will condemn me?"

- Excerpts from Isaiah 49 - 50